20250823 Saturday, August 23, 2025. Shenyang Wedding Day

20250823 Saturday, August 23, 2025. Shenyang Wedding Day

Although we had received a written schedule of events by the local wedding planner and director, there was much uncertainty on everyone’s part about how the day would go, but we pretty much stepped through a highly scripted ritual under the guidance of the wedding organizer, like a movie director.  

Ciara’s day started at 5:30 a.m. with hair and make-up.  Ciara said that these past 3 days have involved wearing false eyelashes and getting her eyebrows shaved three times.  Janet then had her makeup applied by their in-house makeup artist.  Then photography and videography began with various people in the wedding party being summoned to appear in the Mao suite, which had been transformed overnight by Tom’s aunties into a bridal suite.

They had arranged an elaborate bedspread for Ciara to be presented upon during the morning’s events.  The bridal suite had a separate bedroom with a door so that Ciara could be sequestered from everyone at various stages.

  
Once everyone was in place, the director gave us the Chinese command for “Action!”Tom and his groomsmen were outside the bridal suite.

After knocking and pleading, Tom was let into the bridal suite front room by Janet and Ben, followed by Tom formally introducing his groomsmen one by one.  Connor had not packed a suit, so he ended up borrowing a period tunic to wear over his clothes for the ceremony.  

Having gained access to the bridal suite, their next question was to gain access into the bedroom, where Ciara awaited, guarded by her brothers and bridesmaids (Jo, BenChen, and KeXin).  Their first obstacle was to answer three questions about Ciara.  If they got it wrong, they had to pay a bribe in the form of red envelopes and could pay additional bribes for hints.  

The second obstacle was running a gauntlet of bridesmaids and brothers.  Then they had to chew out letters from slices of bread to spell out a message of love.  

The funniest thing was they had to shake ping pong balls out of boxes strapped to their backsides to earn enough points to win access to the bride.  

That took at least two bouts of hilarious body shaking.  There were other games, some drinking, and even some eating of noodles and eggs. 

It was hard to see and watch what was going on inside the bedroom with the wedding party, but it will surely be a memorable experience for them all.  The rest of us will have to content ourselves with the video when it is released.  

We were more directly involved with a ceremonial tea presentation, although what we were served was actually just water. 

 
There was a lot of photography and videography going on through all this with the intent of producing a picture-perfect wedding. 

 
The actual ceremony began at 10:58 a.m., an auspicious time according to Chinese tradition.  

Tom entered the stage at the front of the venue and was met by his father, Andy.  He was presented with three drinks.  

Then Ciara made her entry from the back of the venue, stepping up onto a runway down the center of the venue.  Janet then did a ceremonial grooming of the bride with three strokes of a ceremonial comb, taking care not to disturb Ciara’s actual hair.  This was followed by Ben anointing her with a ceremonial ruler, like in a knighting ceremony.  All this was being narrated by the wedding host in Chinese.  

Ciara and Tom then met on the runway and then did some other ceremonial activities together.

One was drinking from two halves of a gourd, and then binding the two halves together with a ceremonial knot.  They also pretended to snip a locket of each other’s hair into a red envelope.

Then the parents joined them on the stage. There was a round of speeches made by Tom in both English and Mandarin, and by the parents, with the host translating English to Mandarin for Ben and Janet.    

Ben and Janet had recycled the speeches used in Ciara’s Whidbey wedding, editing them down to accommodate the need for translations. Lifen and Andy gave their speeches entirely in Chinese, without an English translation.  Franklin tried to use Google Translate in real time, but that didn’t really work that well.  Daqing said they only said nice things about Ciara and wished the couple well. 

 
The stage was spectacularly decorated and there was professional lighting and sound throughout, making this seem like a Hollywood production.  Ciara was beautiful and graceful throughout.  Her training in musical performance and ballet really paid off.  

There was a presentation of the new couple and the kiss, followed by cheers of happy wedding in Chinese as the newlyweds exited the venue down the runway. 

 
This was followed by an amazing feast with more courses that we could count, and plates literally heaped upon other plates on the center of the table.  Among other things were a whole steamed fish, and a whole giant lobster.  

Ciara and Tom did their beautiful first dance choreography from their US wedding, and then spent the entire lunch banquet walking around the tables paying respect and tribute to all of the family and friends.  We felt sorry that they didn’t even have a place to sit during the banquet.  

While we dined, a crew was busily disassembling the runway and decorations.  As the luncheon finished, a crew came in and swept up the entire banquet room.  It turns out, they had a second wedding scheduled within hours of Ciara’s wedding wrapping up.  By the time we got around to the last of the photography, all of Ciara’s wedding decorations were gone and a crew was putting up new decorations for the second wedding. 

 
This is when we learned that they actually had a second small banquet room set up with a table with the same incredible feast on it just for Tom and Ciara.  Of course, family were invited to keep them company and help eat the enormous pile of food.  As part of the tradition, the bride’s family was presented with a very elaborate box containing ingredients for a feast, including a whole raw fresh fish, and a bunch of other ingredients.  Since we really have no means of preparing a meal from these items, we donated them to one of Tom’s local aunties to enjoy.

  
After everything related to the wedding had wrapped up, Tom and Ciara led a party to a local Shenyang Spa.  It was only a 15-minute walk from the hotel.  These spas are famous for their exfoliating total body scrubs, so that’s what we went for.  There are separate areas for men and women because all the spa treatments are done in the nude.  This made for an interesting and memorable family outing.  After the spa treatments, you can get into pajamas and enter into the lounge area where there are places to relax, drink, and eat.  There was an optional all-you-can-eat buffet, but with all the eating we did at the wedding banquet, we were content with just the fruits and beverages that came with the most basic of the spa packages.

After the spa, Ben, Franklin, John, and Daqing ventured to find the Walmart in Shenyang, which Google Maps showed was only 15 minutes from the spa.  Ben was looking for shoes appropriate for whitewater rafting because he had only brought flip-flops, and Franklin was in need of something for his digestive system. 

Ben did find some suitable shoes at a tiny shop in a pedestrian mall surrounded by food courts, but we pushed on to see what Walmart had to offer.  Unfortunately, it was after 10 p.m.  Someone at the spa said they thought Walmart was open 24 hours, but when we went there, it had closed.  When we went back to the tiny shoe shop, it too was closed.  But there was a store that was open nearby that had some slip-on shoes that could work for only ¥29, which is $4 USD.  For that price, they can be entirely disposable shoes.  

Ben and Franklin got caught in rain on their way back to the hotel, but after all the soaking, scrubbing, and washing in the spa, it was no biggie.  Tomorrow we go on a whitewater rafting adventure.